Testimony from Gethsemane

I happened to bring my Jerusalem journal to Church today and it is a good thing I did because the high councilman was sick so a few of us were called on to fill in. I decided to share something that I had written in Gethsemane and I thought I'd share it here as well so you can see, at least to some degree, what I was feeling in these holy places.

This comes from Friday, June 12

I'm in the Garden of Gethsemane right now. This is my second time now. It's not what I expected- a lot more barren and just a walled area in the middle of the city. I'm sure it's a lot different than it was when Christ was here, but the point is Christ was here. The greatest expression of love in all eternity was performed here. I have not had any overpowering spiritual experience here, such things cannot be forced, but I do have the quiet reassurance that Jesus Christ lives, that He is my Savior. This is a beautiful place of peace in the midst of the confusion of this city. The truth is right before them but it goes unnoticed. I notice though. As I sit in this hallowed place where Perfect blood was spilt as payment for my sins, I'm so grateful for the knowledge of the truth so I too can be made perfect through that cleansing blood.

The Atonement is incomprehensible to mankind but there are a few things I do know. I know that Jesus Christ loves me. I know that He has descended below everything I will ever experience because He wanted to perfectly understand my mortal experience. I know that He is an unwavering friend to whom I can turn in any circumstance and He will always welcome me with open arms. I know He wants desperately for me to come home and to be sealed to Him eternally and that He will help me along the path that leads there. But that path is not easy and victory can only come with Him as my partner. He lived a perfect life because He knew I wouldn't and my only hope of salvation would be through His perfection. He wants me to be clean and pure, and worthy to return to the presence of the Father, worthy to inherit all He has.

Repentance is real. I don't know how that works, but somehow through His suffering, Christ can make it so the consequences of my sin are not eternal. He can take my shame and my guilt so I can stand again with confidence before Him. Though I've hurt the One who loves me most, He carries my burden. I love Him. I never forget that, but sometimes I forget to remember- I forget to act accordingly. I know it's true. Jesus Christ lives. He suffered the Atonement so that I can be like Him. He was lifted up so He can lift me up. I don't need a grand experience to know that- the daily mercies of the Lord are a testament of His love. The peaceful confirmation of the Holy Ghost is enough to know that it is true.